First Application to British Arts Council
Dear Sir/Madam ……………………………….. Your Ref. LACBR 12044/Doc.5
You may remember that I wrote to you over a year ago requesting that I might take advantage of the many literary grants being offered to literary grant abusers, I do beg your pardon applicants by the literature and arts council board of review to have all my posts to the Front Nationale guestbook published in hard copy book form.
I did explicitly express a desire that I would like to retain photographic jurisdiction of the pictorial content of the front cover. If my memory serves me right I also alerted you at the time I was still agonising over a stylised drawing of a Halal Butchers shop or a recent photo of Plunkit sitting at the wheel of one of his Jags.
You may also like to peruse your archival records to establish that at the same time I also requested a first edition, gold bound copy be presented to a Mr Tony Bliar preferably BEFORE his consigns this wonderful country of ours and its indigenous peoples to the smoking dung heap.
I apologise unreservedly for this late alteration but I have since had a change of mind on the pictorial choice of the front cover and have found a wonderful Reuters press photograph of a large gang of Asian youths attacking a lone white boy.
I feel that this graphic photo conveys a much more realistic visual impact for the revised front cover and would be far more appreciated by our readers and easily recognisable as an important signpost mirroring our contempory English society as we see it today and I am sure you and the full board will concur unanimously with this very important but essential late change. (See attachment)
Unfortunately as I have not heard from you I can only assume there might be some reluctance on your part to look favourably on my application no doubt because of the financial restraints involved in the cost of this gold bound special first edition collectors masterpiece personally signed by it’s author that I had requested be gifted without prejudice to a Mr Tony Bliar.
I do fully understand and sympathise with your reticence concerning the financial limitations and constraints placed upon the Arts Council particularly when our government has to contribute about ₤1.2 Million an hour for our governments future re-location to Belgium and eventually like a nervous naïve virgin delivered into the arms of a waiting corrupt EUSSR dictatorship.
In retrospect I wonder if I might apply for an alternative grant being offered to the oppressed and racially disadvantaged groups within our society of which I am a member, for a place at Peterborough University to enable me to complete a course in advanced Social Studies for my PhD.
I would like to research my thesis entitled “THE RISE, DECLINE AND EVENTUAL DEATH OF A SOVEREIGN NATION” I feel this would rate as important a social document of our countries history as was the Magna Carta, I am sure you can appreciate the subtlety I am trying to convey here i.e. ‘the birth of a nation and the death of a nation’?
I eagerly await a fortuitous reply,
PS. If this second application is unsuccessful, I don’t suppose there would be any chance of any further grants on offer that I can apply for, i.e., bush meat cuisine guaranteed to surprise and delight your friends or even mixed evening classes debating the mental anguish, frustrations and the racist marginalisation experienced by coloured immigrant child rapists and cannibals.
Albion. ………………….. AHW ♫151♣ SD 0104/ UP/ BNP
Attachment as mentioned above. The newly revised front cover.